Plagiarism of choices

As a kid most of us yearn to own things, we yearn for love, attention, happiness, time to play, and a gang of friends. But I have heard no one yearn for a taste of their own! That made me feel I'm already on the ROAD NOT TAKEN. Everyone expresses what they like, chooses what they love, has a choice of their own, and calls it their taste. 

It was that one fine evening, I was sitting by my sister and was humming the song she sang, and all of a sudden she hit me for stealing her song. Usually, any protest against her was a failure where I would end up in oceans of tears and a galaxy of thoughts against her. But that day was different. My thoughts were cursing me. All of a sudden I questioned myself, "Why did I sing her song? Don't I have favourites of my own?"

Thoughts piled in and as I turned back nothing I had which I would call my taste. I borrowed them from people around me! My favourite colour green is from my aunt. My favourite dish puliyotharai is from my sister. My favourite climate (sun and rain together) is also pitifully from my sister. I hated winters coz she hated it too. Every song I loved was without doubt her favourite. I loved books for my aunt loved them. I loved certain people coz my mom loved them. I loved trees coz my Dad loved them. Growing up with it was tough. 

This turned out to be terrible when I turned into someone whose opinion changes with others' comments. A mere lack of own taste led to the lack of judging people. I would love people for something. And then when people criticize those people all of a sudden my admiration would fade away. But I must thank myself for loving some people so strong that criticism would last only for a few seconds. I would wonder should I love all people that much to avoid criticism. I never felt it would turn out to be my weakness, I still lack the ability to judge people. Sometimes not having a taste of my own made me feel like a parasite. I struggled to build a taste for my own so that I can judge things.

I realized something after very few years, I have a seeking for something, something I loved from my childhood. STARS! Oh yeah, I loved them much. A cot in the open sky with my hands widely stretched, I would lay and admire the stars. The idea of liking stars expanded in my mind. I loved stargazing. So I loved astronomy, which comes under Physics. And oh yeah I loved Physics. And then I started to love it in a way I never loved anything before. 

But my pursuit was not over. I wanted to have a category for things I love. I started judging things that were easy. I started to admire things through my eyes. I started developing tastes of my own. Next to Physics, the second one I added to my taste was Mr.Stephen Hawking. So came in line the things I admired big bang, black hole, time travel. I loved them not cause Hawking loved them. These things amazed me and would spread warmth in my heart as soon as I hear them, a feeling of curiousness. These made me seek more.

And then something added up to my taste, without actually seeking: 'Pride and Prejudice'.It was my supplementary during my 9th. Initially, I didn't like it as I had to prepare my own essays for them.
One day I was bored of preparing an essay and started reading it and as I finished the book I fell in love with the book. In a beautiful way, the characters had attracted me. Pride and Prejudice is still my most favourite and Mr.Darcy became my favourite person in fiction. I started to love old homes. I fell in love with writing and found pleasure

I further started to have more things to love. Basketball gliding through my hands made its way to my heart. Arts attracted me. And then I succeeded in a prime aim of developing my tastes and since
then I was out of being parasitic, but I still do share my tastes with my close associates. But I have my own choices too. It did not end there. 

As tough as it was to develop tastes, so it was to live by expressing them and being criticized. Criticism always hurts at first but as you learn to digest them and move ahead with parts of it being helpful to advance. In this world, teen world, I have heard people being judged by appearance, once appearance is out of the option you will be judged for your choices.

Every criticism lives in my heart and still, my tastes push them to the smallest edge. Growing up with the struggle made me stand up against one thing, every criticism is now faced by the flashback of struggles I've been through. And made me realize whatever happens I would never give up on my tastes, they define me, and love them for defining me. 

Your tastes are part of you and remember to stand up for them.